Coping as a Neurodivergent IFS Coach

I have been playing a lot of Star Wars: Empire at War. How much? Enough to make my wife notice. Enough that I wonder where the time went. Enough that I feel embarrassed about how much I am playing.

This video game binge took me by surprise, because I typically haven’t enjoyed the Star Wars universe. It’s seemed simplistic in its politics and cartoonish in its Jedi mythology. I guess you could say it’s a little black-and-white for my taste.

I grew up in a religious cult that tried to super-impose a black-and-white filter on human experience. I spent so much energy pretending I couldn’t see in color, because everyone around me insisted it wasn’t there. That’s why I harbor a bias against fictional mythologies that present the human experience as a two-dimensional struggle between ‘good’ versus ‘evil.’

I still see the world in color, but I also recognize that American culture is moving in a direction that saps the color out of life so that it actually starts to resemble Star Wars. In 2026, we are ruled by a corrupt Imperial figure who is doing everything he can to destroy democratic accountability. Later this year, I expect that Trump will use the military to seize ballot boxes in major cities in swing states. ICE agents are cosplaying as storm troopers as they kidnap and torture immigrants, and kill American citizens with impunity. Pedophile billionaires have turned out to be the most protected class in our country. I have never felt more punk, or like a member of the Rebellion.

So, why am I playing the video game as The Galactic Empire instead of as the Rebellion? As someone with ADHD, I often find it challenging to stay emotionally regulated while listening to the news. For me, playing as the Empire has become a coping mechanism, a way to process my own feelings about the state of our world. Because, I feel like I still part of the Empire, and that Empire is headed to war.

One of my special interests is defense economics. The parallels between the Empire’s fleet of Star Destroyers and our own maritime navy is striking. The way the Empire utilizes military strength and technology to maintain control – it’s not so different from how we wield power today. And, as the Imperial fleet was tested by the Rebellion; I expect that our own military dominance in the Pacific Ocean will be challenged by a newly formidable Chinese navy.

This video game is also my way of emotionally engaging with the possibility of a major naval conflict within the next decade. Reflecting on this has made me realize how often I use video games to process my feelings. Games like the Legend of Zelda have made me feel like I could have a life of adventure and meaning. Being lost in the labrynths of Dark Souls helps me externalize my feelings of isolation. Playing as a scrappy human resistance to alien invasions is my catharsis for how I frequently feel that my ADHD brain is under-resourced for the challenges of surviving in our world today.

We often talk about how video games provide dopamine for ADHD brains, but we often don’t dig deeper into the emotional needs that video games are filling in our Parts. If you feel like video games are becoming problematic for you, and if you would like to talk about that in a non-judgmental space, I am just a click away.